Stopping Negative Thoughts Doesn't Work — SS #47

Negative thoughts impact us all.

Maybe it’s 3-all in the second set and you’ve won the first.

You double-fault.

“Don’t double-fault again. Why does my serve always do this? No. I don’t want to think like this. Why does my serve suck?”

You miss another serve.

“My serve sucks. Why does it let me down? No. Go away. I don’t want to think like this. Don’t double-fault again.”

Maybe you’ve read some sports psychology and heard about “thought stopping”—a technique where you try to stop a negative thought from occurring by verbalizing, “no,” or, “stop.”

“Stop,” you think again.

No luck.

“STOP.”

You double-fault again.

Before you know it, thoughts about how shitty your serve is keep returning to your mind.

You struggle to recover. And now you’re consistently dealing with thoughts that confirm how poor your serve is.

Thought Stopping Doesn’t Work (for Most)

Though you may find some sports psychologists and mental performance coaches advocating for the use of thought stopping, the research suggests otherwise. For example, Koster et al. (2008) argue that thought and emotional suppression can be considered a dysfunctional strategy. It can lead to an increased focus on intrusive thoughts. Not only that, but it can also create an “ironic process” (Wegner). This is where you end up thinking more about the thing you don’t want to think about.

Don’t believe me (or the research)? Try this out.

Don’t think of an orange banana.

Seriously.

Try to not think of an orange banana for 10 seconds.

Could you do it?

Additionally, a systematic review and meta-analysis of 31 qualifying studies by Wang et al. (2020) confirmed the idea of this rebound effect. Basically, it’s when an individual re-experiences their suppressed thought.

There was also an immediate enhancement of the negative thought that was trying to be suppressed when this was done under cognitive load. In other words, when individuals were preoccupied with tasks, banishing negative thoughts was even harder.

Tennis players can learn from this in the sense that we are basically trying to execute and be aware of a plethora of things when competing on the tennis court. When we throw in the idea of stopping negative thoughts with ineffective treatments such as thought-stopping, we are bound to experience them with greater intensity.

So… are we hopeless? Are we doomed to experience these negative thoughts even though we understand that they impede our performance?

No. There are two ways we can potentially handle them.

Stop and Replace via Self-Talk or Self-Compassion

Instead of merely trying to stop the thought from occurring, we can have ready-made retorts and responses available to handle your consistent negative thoughts.

For example, with the example I gave about having those thoughts on serve, you can retort, “No. You can do it. Don’t be critical. Don’t fixate. Think about what’s next.” Or you can also take more of a self-compassionate approach and ask, “How would I speak to my child or loved one at this moment?”

Lauer (2010) agrees, writing, “From consulting experiences and research, sport psychology has revealed that thought stopping is not enough. If a player uses thought-stopping exclusively, she can develop a tendency for negative thoughts to continue because her mindset has not shifted. The mind has to move to more positive and productive thinking. A player I was consulting talked about how he was able to stop the negative thoughts, but that they kept coming back. He found that he was becoming mentally tired because he was spending a great deal of time thought stopping during his matches.”

Lauer goes on to note how the player eventually found success via positive self-talk.

Perhaps you can, too.

An Acceptance-Commitment Therapy (ACT) Approach

I’d like you to take some time to watch the following reel. It’s American player Elliot Spizzirri speaking about the work that he does with his sports psychology practitioner.

The American mentions that trying to stop or engage with those negative thoughts doesn’t really work for him and he finds himself engaging and struggling with those thoughts.

I find that acceptance-commitment and tangential concepts are thrown around by individuals who do not fully grasp their meaning, so I want to clarify what an acceptance-commitment approach in tennis would not look like before we move on.

Sometimes it is explained as, “Just accept that you’re going to have negative thoughts.”

‘Huh?’ the athlete thinks. ‘Why the hell am I paying this lady $300 per session? So that she can tell me that I need to just accept the thoughts that are happening in my mind? What a rip-off.’

That’s not what an ACT-based approach is about.

It’s not about giving up or letting negative thoughts run wild.

It’s about changing your relationship with those thoughts.

Instead of trying to fight them, or kick them out of your head like an unwanted guest, you acknowledge that they’ve shown up—but you don’t give them the mic.

You don’t need to engage. You don’t need to argue.

You learn to let them be there without letting them dictate your actions.

The focus shifts from control (which is impossible) to commitment:

What do you want to do right now, in spite of these thoughts?

You might hear, ‘My serve sucks. I always double-fault when it counts.’

Instead of spiraling or trying to push the thought away, you acknowledge it:

‘Okay. That’s a thought I’m having.’

Not the truth. Not a prophecy.

Just a string of words your mind threw out. And our minds are fascinating, sometimes kooky, things.

This is called cognitive distancing.

(An ACT practitioner might teach cognitive defusion techniques to facilitate cognitive distancing.)

You create just enough space between you and the thought so it doesn’t own you.

You might even name it:

‘Ah, there’s the ‘my serve sucks’ story again.’

‘I wonder what’s up with that little guy in my head. Maybe he could use a nice steak.’

It sounds small. But that little shift—from ‘this is true’ to ‘this is just a thought’—can be everything.

Then you bring your attention back to the present moment.

To your breath. To your strings. To your feet. To the feel of the ball in your hand.

These are anchors—simple, physical cues that ground you in reality instead of rumination.

Mindfulness in this context isn’t sitting cross-legged. It’s paying attention—on purpose—to what matters right now.

You commit to your values—competing, staying composed, executing—even if the noise is still there in the background.

That’s the heart of ACT. It’s not about perfect positivity. It’s about psychological flexibility.

Because when the shit hits the fan in a match, flexibility beats perfection every time.

That’s it for today.

Let me know if you have any questions—and I wish you the best in performing on the tennis court.

Remember, you can always hit reply if you have questions or if you just want to chat.

— Malhar

P.s. I spend hours every week writing this. If you’re finding value, please consider sharing it with a tennis friend or online.

P.p.s. I was on a major time crunch and wasn’t able to place the references below. I’ll add them in over the next few days. Just email me back if you’re interested in some academic sport psychology and psychology reading!

Disclaimer: I am not an Association of Applied Sports Psychology CMPC, certified sports psychology practitioner, nor am I a licensed mental health counselor, PsyD, or clinical PhD. I am pursuing a master’s in sports, exercise, and performance psychology, and I am a sports psychology practitioner-in-training. I have over 20 years of experience in tennis, including playing, and coaching collegiately and with professional players, along with club management experience as a director of programs. I am certified by the Professional Tennis Registry and am a member of Tennis Australia. My aim is to bring the best information to tennis players around the world so that you can apply it for long-term improvement—but sometimes I will make mistakes. If this is your area of research or expertise, and you feel I’ve misunderstood something, please get in touch with me and if required I will happily issue a correction.